Personal Boundaries

Sarah Black

Sarah Black

Personal Boundaries are limits and rules we set for ourselves.   Within relationships a person with healthy boundaries can say no to others when they want to, but they are also comfortable opening themselves up to intimacy and close relationship.   A person who keeps others at a distance whether emotionally, physically or otherwise, is said to have rigid boundaries. 

Alternatively, someone who tends to get too involved with others, where there’s too much of a crossover, are called people with porous boundaries.  Common traits of all three are the following: 

Rigid boundaries, normally avoid intimacy in close relationships, unlikely to ask for help, may seem detached with being romantic publicly and very protective of personal information. 

Porous boundaries,  overshare personal information, get over involved with other peoples problems, and they are dependant on other one other peoples opinion. 

 Healthy boundaries, value own opinions, don’t compromise values with others ,they know what they want and they know what they need and they communicate that.   They accept when others say no to them. 

Most people have a mix of boundaries types, between the healthy and porous really depending on circumstances, environment.  Who they are with, what they are doing.  The appropriate boundaries depend heavily on the setting, whether at work, whether at home, whether with your friends.   Your boundaries are going to be slightly different in each situation and also we need to consider that different cultures are have different expectations of us and that produces different boundaries.   Some cultures say it’s OK to be emotionally expressive in public and others say it isn’t a boundary of their culture so they prefer to keep all of those emotions private. 

Types of personal Boundaries:

Fortunately, there are a few ways to not only feel worthy enough to speak up about your boundaries at work but to do so in a way that feels productive and effective for everyone involved. 

Setting healthy boundaries in a professional environment – whether you work at a corporate job, are self-employed, or somewhere in between – can have immense benefits on the overall happiness and productivity of your work force and your career. 

Healthy professional boundaries are limits and rules that we follow to govern how we work, run our businesses, and interact with others. 

When we are actively setting boundaries in our professional lives, we are working towards reducing stress, increasing happiness, and improving productivity. 

Clarify roles and responsibilities, firstly, if you have a boss that you need to consider then offer one to one and go through your current job role at your responsibilities.  Set your expectations with your co-workers and your customers.  This may require you being upfront about projects you really want to do, what you don’t want to do for your skill set, for your competency and your confidence. 

Remind true to your financial worth this means if you are employed asking for a raise when you actually deserve it and if you’re self employed sticking to your set pay rates.   

If communicate needs aren’t being met by appropriate parties don’t be afraid to voice an opinion, especially if it isn’t working for you or you’re not receiving the support that you required to complete a job or project. 

Take a break, support your physical and mental welfare.  Everyone needs a break now and again.  Communicate with your boss if you have one, that your physical mental wellbeing is really important.  

We need to work smarter not harder more likely to be to do a job well if you have set your boundaries. 

It’s about setting boundaries and then look at your boundaries.   Always analyse what you do and always consider saying no if you need to, and if you do not feel comfortable in something.   Boundaries are absolutely vital to health and well being and your own productivity. 

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